Any compulsive shoppers out there dodging calls from your therapists and looking for that next rush of endorphins?
Well, look no effing further! Enabling is what I do best! Apparently.
Bad Mama Genny is here once again to fulfill your misguided attempt to find real joy through consumerism! Today’s installment has it all: corseted cake baking, Foo Fighters, Mr. Darcy, sneaking alcohol into baked goods, and EVEN a bloodthirsty killer who’s not so rude as to be unconcerned that you might burn yourself!
I’ll explain later.
Waste no time, misfits! We leave at daybreak!**
**RELAX, nobody’s going anywhere at daybreak; I’ve just always wanted to say that.**
This book of American mugshots will have the misfit in you riveted and fantasizing about that life of crime you always meant to lead. But of course, there’s no need to shell out the mega bucks if you’re bad enough to take this task on yourself. BMG says, make a regular date with a photo booth near you and make your own mugshot book. Of course, if you’re still not sold on the magic of photo booths, just watch Amelie. Works for me EVERY TIME.
3. The newest Foo Fighters album, “Wasting Light”
‘Cause BMG’s misfits need to rock out, too. And who better to help you than one of our most esteemed patron saints, Dave Grohl?
Why do you need a set of measuring spoons that looks like fine, antique silverware?
No seriously, your mom might like these. It’s about as ladylike as we get around here.
Anyway, the real reason is so that you can make a cake whilst fancying yourself to be a saucy Victorian lady from a Jane Austen novel. Then you can get all swoony when Mr. Darcy walks into the kitchen and samples the frosting from the bowl. You’ll let it slide this time, but only because he tugged on your corset-laces so charmingly. And because, hey. It’s fucking Mr. Darcy.
5. Jaws Oven Mitt (giveaway)
If I have to tell you why this is awesome, I don’t think this is the right blog for you.
And I’m giving away a FREE mitt to one lucky misfit!
1 Chance: Leave a comment on this post telling me what you’d be pulling out of the oven while Jaws chows down on your succulent, meaty arms.
2 Chances: Want an extra go? Follow me on Twitter for the first time, and leave a second comment here telling me that you did.
3 Chances: Still not enough for you? Damn if you misfits aren’t demanding! Well, I’m an obliging Bad Mama Genny. Link to my blog on your blog and leave a comment with the link to your post.
You have until Friday, September 16th at noon (CST) to enter, so hike up your fishnets and get going! I’ll announce the lucky misfit shortly after.
Love and big red kisses,