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Posts Tagged ‘grow-your-own’

Friends…

Friends…

Friends?

Oh, there you are.  I think it’s time I shared a few things with you.  This is important.

See, I told you a while back that I was growing a fruit and veggie garden on my city steps.  In containers.  And grow I have.

Now, some of you may have been discouraged by things you’ve read online.  Perhaps some naysayers in an online chatroom told you it was nearly impossible to grow vegetables in containers.  Perhaps someone with the screen name @negativenancy told you if you didn’t have ten acres and a dairy cow, growing food for your family was impossible.  Maybe some square told you that you weren’t wholesome enough or ankle-length-skirty enough or straight enough or come-to-Jesus enough to homestead.  Well.  You know how I feel about all that. 

Perhaps the doubt came from inside you.  Maybe that little voice in the back of your head said, “Grow vegetables?  When I don’t even have a yard?  Chya!  Like that’ll happen!”

But friends.

Friends…

Friends?

It’s time to silence those voices once and for all.  Because here…

right here…

right now…

we are going to have a spiritual experience…

Look, this is as close as Bad Mama Genny gets to religion, so soak it up, misfits.

To all those who said I couldn’t grow bell peppers in a measly pot…

I did!

To those who say you can’t grow squash in a box on some city steps?

You can!

To those who say eggplant should be left to those with a garden plot…

Hellz bellz, no!

To those who say there’s no way you can grow HEIRLOOM FUCKING BRANDYWINE TOMATOES, the undisputed flavor king of tomatoes, in a garbage can on a stoop?

Oh, yeah…I went there…

Oh, yes.  Yes, yes, yes, YOU CAN!

To those who think the only kind of tomato to grow in a container is a cherry tomato, to those who say you can’t grow a  super-productive, full-size tomato variety in a pot…

Think again!

Starting to feel better about your gardening future?  Baby, I’m just getting started!

To those who think that a planter on a stairway is no place for lemon cucumbers…

Or prolific white cucumbers, or pickling cucumbers…

Wrong again!

Can I get an AMEN?!

AMEN!!!

I said, can I get an AMEN?!

AMEN!!

Because Bad Mama Genny has SEEN the mountaintop!  Er, I mean, the top of the stairwell!  And it looks pretty nice!

To those who say you cannot grow good carrots, beets, chard, and kale in ordinary flowerpots…

I beg to differ!

And they’re just so gosh darn cute right now!

Hey, those of you who think you can’t grow an ORANGE TREE in a pot in a city known for 3 foot snowfalls and 20 below windchills…

What what!

And hey, while we’re busy defying the logic of the naysayers, how about a BANANA tree?

To those who say I’m crazy and have a problem that most likely requires medication…

Well, they’re probably right about that one.

And guys?  This isn’t even everything I’m growing.

Don’t let the naysayers tell you what you can and can’t do.  Don’t let anyone convince you that vegetable gardening belongs in a proper yard or in the ground.  And geez-friggin–louise, don’t believe people who say you can’t have a garden.  Most of you probably can.

If you have a stairwell…

a rooftop…

a fire escape…

a balcony…

a measly window…

a railing…

a generous landlord…

a local community garden…

a countertop to make sprouts…

a dark cabinet for a mushroom log…

You can garden!  Plants want to grow.  They want to live.  They want to make fruit.  They’re not working against you.  (The squirrels are.)

And if you can find a way to give them the basic things they need, they’ll thrive.  And so will you.

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